Category: Ensign’s Log, Stardate…

Original air date: February 9, 1968

SYNOPSIS

The Enterprise is guided to a distant, long-dead world where survivors of an extremely ancient race – existing only as disembodied energy – desiring the bodies of Kirk, Spock and astro-biologist Ann Mulhall so that they may live again.

CANON CONTEXT

This episode was the first appearance of Diana Muldaur in the Star Trek franchise. She appeared again as Dr. Miranda Jones in the third season episode, “Is There in Truth No Beauty?” and as Dr. Katherine Pulaski in the second season of Star Trek: The Next Generation. It seems the Star Trek franchise was running low on female actresses to play a doctor?

RECAP

Consider this to be one of the shortest reviews I hope to do for this series. Mostly because it’s a storyline I’ve seen and written about too many times already. Let’s go over it quickly, shall we?

Orb like thing that is a being so god-like it can squash humanity like a bug chooses three members of the Enterprise to inhabit their bodies. Purpose? So they can use these bodies in order to build robots that look human but will live forever. See, they hate living their life in orbs for all eternity. In this form they don’t have hands and legs to build with and to ask a human to build what they need just would take too long. They are far superior and therefore could do the work in less than half the time.

Kirk is squarely on their side and wants to donate his body to this cause. It could mean so much to humanity if they do. Why? Well, I can’t quite explain that right now as it makes little sense but trust him, it does. As usual, Bones is against it and thinks the whole thing is ridiculous. I think he’s jealous that he wasn’t one of the three these orbs chose to inhabit.

The being that inhabits Spock has other plans in mind, especially as his body is far superior in strength and thinking than that of Kirk and Dr. Jones. She is this episode’s “femme fatale” except she’s not a damsel in distress like the others.

Spock plans on killing Jones and Kirk and taking control of the ship all while remaining in the body he’s in.

But, like any warm blooded human he would love some companionship or at least an ally. Who better than the woman. If he could only get rid of her husband. Let us take a brief pause to see what the male robot they are building will look like.

The perfect male specimen? Yikes. I feel bad for the actor who had to lay there during this scene lathered in that vaseline?

Suffice it to say, the orb who inhabits Kirk’s body dies, taking Kirk with him. The woman decides not to help Spock, but instead to use her power to revive Kirk. I had no doubt of this. And you shouldn’t either.

In the end, the leader of the tri-orb (as I like to think of them) didn’t really die, just like Kirk didn’t. He is pleased that his wife didn’t succumb to the evil ways of their friend who was busy trying to take over the Enterprise (and by extension the world). All of the gods return to their orbs where they voluntarily destroy their orb vessels and “disappear into space”? No idea, really. Let’s just say they are gone and all is right in the world.

DID THEY REALLY SAY THAT?

Capt. Kirk: They used to say if man could fly, he’d have wings, but he did fly. He discovered he had to. Do you wish that the first Apollo mission hadn’t reached the moon, or that we hadn’t gone on to Mars and then to the nearest star? That’s like saying you wish that you still operated with scalpels and sewed your patients up with catgut like your great-great-great-great grandfather used to. I’m in command. I could order this, but I’m not because Doctor McCoy is right in pointing out the enormous danger potential in any contact with life and intelligence as fantastically advanced as this, but I must point out that the possibilities – the potential for knowledge and advancement – is equally great. Risk! Risk is our business. That’s what this starship is all about. That’s why we’re aboard her. You may dissent without prejudice. Do I hear a negative vote?

Original air date: February 2, 1968

Captain’s Log, Stardate: 4211.4

SYNOPSIS

Peaceful, primitive peoples get caught up in the struggle between superpowers, with Kirk unhappily trying to restore the balance of power disrupted by the Klingons.

CANON CONTEXT

Don Ingalls’ first draft of the script had specific references to the Vietnam War, such as Mongolian-type clothes and a character described as a “Ho Chi Minh” type. Other early ideas included Kirk’s friendship with Tyree developing completely during Kirk’s second visit to the planet and a personal conflict between Kirk and Krell the Klingon. Eugene Myers and Torie Atkinson of Tor.com argue that the episode is sexist in its presentation of Nona, and that the episode, in trying too hard to be an allegory for the war in Vietnam, fails to find a peaceful, Star Trek, solution to the problem.

RECAP

This is a strange episode, one of those that was clearly written at the time for the time. Notes of the Vietnam war and a clear message on whether it was a good or bad thing. Hint: Seems like just about everyone felt it was not a good thing.

In the case of this episode, Kirk is visiting friends on a planet that he hadn’t been to since his early days at the academy. Not soon after transporting onto the planet, Kirk, Spock and Bones find an enemy group with firearms shooting at the friendlier and non-violent group. Kirk interferes to save the lives of his friends but it ends up getting Spock shot!

Back at sickbay, Spock’s internal organs are fighting to save his life and heal themselves. Who’s the dude on the left? He’s the doctor in charge because Bones has to go back down to the planet with Kirk to investigate how guns are on a planet that should be progressing at a really slow pace.

We’ll get back to Spock and his progress later.

On the planet, strange gorilla looking creature. Why do I feel like this isn’t the first time I’ve seen a creature (Mugato) that looked like this in the show?

It attacks Kirk before he’s able to get to the Hill People camp. It’s up to Bones to get him to safety and help before he dies as this creature apparently is poisonous. Back at camp we find out that Tyree, Kirk’s friend is the leader now and his wife, Nona, is the only one who can cure Kirk and save his life. Now, what happens next is… really strange and inappropriate to put on tv. I mean, what in the heck is going on here? You tell me?

Okay, so after that happens, where they apparently swapped souls or something, I leave it up to your own interpretation, he now belongs to her. This means she uses some sort of flower or something that has hallucinogens in it that makes her husband go all horny for her.

And it works even better on Kirk who probably would’ve got all up in that even without her little flower but whatever helps him sleep at night for pawing all over his friend’s wife.

Are we going off the rails a bit? Damn right, we are! There’s a femme fatale here! But back on track, Nona (the femme) wants Kirk to provide her husband and tribe with their phasers in order to defend themselves against their enemy who has guns. Oh, and I should probably mention the guns came from Klingon who apparently have visited the planet a while ago and provided the guns in order to cause chaos. Cause that’s what they do!

When Kirk finds out the Klingons are involved he feels the only solution to the problem is to give his friend guns to even the playing field. Bones thinks this is a stupid idea but they do it anyway.

Good idea? Bad idea? Only time will tell. But Nona is dead. And his friend, Tyree, who resisted guns, now finds himself wanting to kill the enemy who took the love of his life. The end.

Oh wait, Spock! Of course he survives. But if you ask how, Nurse Chapel is instructed to do whatever Spock asks of her in his current hypnosis. His request? To slap him hard over and over again with all her might! Yep, and she does it. It’s a scene you gotta see to believe. When Scotty walks in on this he’s mortified! “What are you doing, woman?”

DID THEY REALLY SAY THAT?

Dr. M’Benga: Don’t let these low panel readings bother you. I’ve seen this before in Vulcans. It’s their way of concentrating all their strength, blood and antibodies onto the injured organs – a form of self-induced hypnosis.

Nurse Chapel: You mean he’s conscious?

Dr. M’Benga: Well, in a sense. He knows we’re here and what we’re saying, but he can’t afford to take his mind from the tissue he’s fighting to heal. I suppose he even knows you were holding his hand.

Nurse Chapel: [embarrassed] A good nurse always treats her patients that way. It proves she’s interested.

Original Air Date: January 19, 1968

Captains Log Stardate 4307.1

SYNOPSIS

The Enterprise encounters a gigantic energy draining space organism that threatens the galaxy.

CANON CONTEXT

When this episode was filmed, George Takei was filming The Green Berets and therefore unavailable to portray his character, Lt. Sulu. John Winston’s character, Lt. Kyle, occupied Sulu’s helmsman’s seat, wearing a gold command tunic instead of his usual red engineering tunic that he wore as transporter chief. However, Kirk repeatedly mispronounced his name in this episode as “Cowell”.

RECAP

You know a story hasn’t got much going for it when you search for images to use alongside and there are few and far between. In short, the crew happen upon a thing in space. Stop me if you’ve heard this set-up before…

The thing in space, a mystery by all accounts, must be observed and investigated as that is the purpose of the Enterprise. Of course, some on the ship are a bit annoyed as they were on their way to some R&R before they encountered this black hole that isn’t a black hole.

Spock is, as their science officer, full of answers as to what it isn’t, but has no help whatsoever as to what it actually is. Before they can do any further testing with probes and whatnot, they find themselves having passed through it. They know this because their surroundings are pitch black with no stars or anything around them.

I won’t go into the science uncovered while trying to figure out a way out of this thing they are trapped in. I had a bit of a hard time following it myself and I looked the damn episode up on Wikipedia just so I can try to brush up on what I just saw. Trust me, not worth the read.

What I will say is that the answer came about by Spock and Bones essentially playing rock, paper, scissors to determine which one of them got to board the Galileo to get a closer look and possibly free the Enterprise from whatever hold it has on the ship. Both men were pretty adamant about wanting to be the one to discover this thing IN THE NAME OF SCIENCE!

Leaving Kirk to decide which one of them is best suited for the mission that could very well result in death. Spock is chosen much to annoyance of Bones.

The thing seems to be very fish-like in how it looks and they determine that they must destroy it or it will basically multiply and swallow the entire universe! Scary stuff, I know.

You may be surprised to know that the Enterprise manages to not only destroy the thing but save Spock as well! All is happy in happytown! The crew also are able to stay on course towards the rest they so deserve.

The end.

DID THEY REALLY SAY THAT?

Mr. Spock: That sound was the turbulence caused by the penetration of a boundary layer, Captain.

Capt. Kirk: What boundary layer?

Mr. Spock: Unknown.

Capt. Kirk: A boundary layer between what and what?

Mr. Spock: Between where we were and where we are.

Capt. Kirk: Are you trying to be funny, Mr. Spock?

Mr. Spock: It would never occur to me, Captain.

Mr. Spock: [Kirk has ordered a tractor beam placed on the shuttlecraft.] Captain, I recommend you abandon the attempt. Do not risk the ship further on my behalf.

Dr. McCoy: Shut up, Spock, we’re rescuing you!

Mr. Spock: Why, thank you, *Captain* McCoy.

SYNOPSIS

The crew of the Enterprise struggles to cope with a planet of imitative people who have modeled their society on 1920s gangsters.

CANON CONTEXT

This was the last Star Trek script credited to Gene L. Coon.

RECAP

What do you think about mobster movies? They were all the rage back in the late 60’s after The Rat Pack and Ocean’s Eleven made such a splash (to name a couple notable ones). I am sure the cast must love when episodes like these are done because it gets them out of their standard starfleet uniform (except for Kirk, of course, who may spend an entire episode topless) and into more “civilian” clothing.

This episode sees the Enterprise on their way to a planet that was “interfered” with by a previous starship and now, they are tasked to see the damage that may have been caused because of said interference. Did I mention this planet is inhabited by “imitative people” meaning they will completely become whatever they learn or see. And in this case, that starship left behind this lovely little (?) book for them to study and become:

And when I tell you they hit the nail on the head on this planet, I mean it. The language was actually a bit foreign to me and I thought I knew all the lingo from the 20’s. Not because I was born during that time, though I’ve been told I have a pretty old soul, but because I’ve seen my share of mobster movies. But I digress.

When Kirk and Spock and Bones beam down onto the planet they are met by guys in suits carrying some pretty heavy weaponry around. Even the women on the streets are packing. And if you ain’t packin’ brother are you in trouble! Know what I mean?

They announce their arrival to the “leader” or who they consider the leader because he owns and manages the largest part of the planet thus far. Being that this is all based on mobs, whoever has control over the most territory is the big cheese. Know what I mean?

Can’t say I like (or get?) the names of the two mob bosses we meet in this episode so I won’t bother you with what they are or use them. I like to give names based on appearance (yes, I’m shallow like that, my wife tells me all the time) and so for the purposes of this review I’m gonna refer to the big mob boss as “glasses guy.” Not pretty but it fits. Kirk and crew meet with him and he tries to strike a deal with them. He knows they must be pretty advanced and all that since the last ship paid them a visit. So he wants the Enterprise to supply him with enough weapons to take over all the other mobsters so that he’s the big kahuna. In return he’ll cut them in on the action. Something like that. Of course, Kirk (and starfleet for that matter) wouldn’t really like such a deal that could result in casualties.

But sooner or later Kirk has to acquiesce to the norms of his surroundings and what better way than to dress the part?

I’ve always loved a pin stripe suit and hope to one day have one tailor made for me. But I must say, Captain, that hat is not working for me at all.

In the suits they fleeced from guys working for the glasses dude they attempt to infiltrate the next largest mob boss. Let’s call him bowtie guy. He’s interested in a similar arrangement with glasses dude as they are both pretty tired of hitting each other (aka killing each others guys). That can get pretty old pretty fast.

By now you’ll be lulled into a false sense of glee and find yourself smiling for no reason. It was giving me that nostalgic feel for shows from this time period. I found myself wanting to watch I Dream of Jeanie or the original Batman television show.

One such laughing gag came when Kirk had to get them away from some mob guys playing poker nearby. He tells them about this game they play nowadays that’s much more complicated than poker which is silly stuff. The look on this guy’s face as he not only thinks he’s following Kirk’s rules but that he’s winning a game they aren’t even playing yet is one for the slapstick ages!

Another character worth mentioning is the kid on the street who thinks he’s a tough guy and just “wants a piece of the action” when he sees Kirk and Spock carrying their guns. The kid knows their about to bust in on one of the mob bosses and offers to help them as long as they cut him in. Who could turn down a face like this?

In the end, Kirk manages to convince all the mob bosses that they would be stupid not to take the federation seriously. He negotiates a deal where the glasses dude will be the leader of all the mobs with bowtie guy as his lieutenant. Together they will run the entire planet in a less mob-like way. In return, the federation will take a 40% cut of the action. Pretty sweet deal, if you ask me.

Of course, Spock has to sour it by asking how Kirk intends on informing the federation that annually they have to send a ship to this planet to collect. What a party pooper!

DID THEY REALLY SAY THAT?

The whole episode is one great line/scene after another. But here’s how it ends:

[last lines]

Capt. Kirk: All right, Bones, in the language of the planet, “What’s your beef?”

Dr. McCoy: Well, I don’t know how serious this is, Jim. And I don’t quite know how to tell you…

Capt. Kirk: Go ahead.

Dr. McCoy: But in all the confusion, I…

Capt. Kirk: Tell me.

Dr. McCoy: I think I left it in Bela’s office.

Capt. Kirk: You left it?

Dr. McCoy: Somewhere, I’m-I’m not certain.

Capt. Kirk: You’re not certain of what?

Dr. McCoy: I left my communicator.

Capt. Kirk: In Bela’s office?

Spock: Captain, if the Iotians, who are very bright an imitative people, should take that communicator apart…

Capt. Kirk: They will, they will. And they’ll find out how the transtator works.

Spock: The transtator is the basis for every important piece of equipment that we have – the transporter, the…

Capt. Kirk: [overlapping] Everything, everything.

Dr. McCoy: You really think it’s that serious?

Capt. Kirk: Serious? Serious, Bones? It upsets the whole percentage.

Dr. McCoy: How do you mean?

Capt. Kirk: Well, in a few years, the Iotians may demand a piece of OUR action.

Officer’s Log, Stardate 3259.2 made by officer Spock.

SYNOPSIS

Kirk, Uhura and Chekov are trapped on a planet where abducted aliens are enslaved and trained to perform as gladiators for the amusement of bored, faceless aliens.

CANON CONTEXT

The popular Star Trek catchphrase “Beam me up, Scotty” is a common misquotation, with The Oxford Dictionary of Quotations stating that the nearest equivalent is the phrase uttered in this episode: “Scotty, beam us up.”

RECAP

This one is a bit of a hot-button episode as it delves into the idea of slavery. At least, as much as they could considering the time period when television could get away with a multitude of sins.

We start with a small crew of Kirk, Uhura, and Chekhov beaming down onto a planet for observations. That is what Enterprise is all about after all. Except, they don’t exactly beam down. They are brought down there by a being that is far superior to their own.

Once on the planet they are met by a group of “misfits” I think is the best word I can come up with to describe them. They are each different with varying degrees of odd make-up jobs.

The leader of the group, suffering the worst kind of make-up out of all of them, in my estimation, is the bald-headed guy in the middle there. He explains to the crew that they are now slaves and will each be assigned one person who will take care of them and train them. One guess who gets paired with Kirk…

They are equipped with this collar that can stun them if they get out of line and, well, you know this crew by now, getting out of line is their bread and butter.

Kirk quickly “falls in love” with little miss green hair and the rest is television history as I like to think of it. I’m sure if I did some digging someone out there has cataloged the exact number of women that Kirk found interest in throughout the series. Then again, it has been, what, an entire episode since he had a femme fatale to dominate.

Getting back to the story, the crew have to figure out how to outsmart a being that believes itself to be superior. So superior, in fact, that they are bored and therefore concocted this “game” if you will, where beings from all over the galaxy are brought to this planet for their amusement. A group of men will bet on who they believe will win in random fights. Sort of like gladiators.

Kirk ends up appealing to this voice that speaks from high above and they grant him permission to meet with them to discuss how he might make a deal with them.

Hold on to your hats as you feast your eyes upon the beings that have such enormous power!

Oh, and let’s not overlook shirtless Kirk. If there is one thing we can be guaranteed to see is his nipples at least once whenever he’s got femme fatale scenes. I wonder if that was a clause in his contract? Or a stipulation by the studio that he must appear shirtless for at least half of the season.

Either way, these colorful (I realize the colors come as a result of the remaster as the show was originally in black and white) brains get outsmarted by Kirk who agrees to battle anyone of their choosing. If he’s victorious then the brains must agree to no longer have slaves but to teach them to be self-sufficient instead. If he loses, then the entire Enterprise will have to live on the planet to be slaves forever. Not a bad deal if I do say so myself.

But not to worry, Kirk would never let the Enterprise go that easily. Of course he manages to win out in the end. The people on the planet are free now and the femme fatale pledges to wait for him down on the planet.

How lucky Kirk is to get all these women falling for him only to easily leave them behind. No commitments. What a life!

One last thing I want to mention a bit out of order from how the episode went, but it is important as the main topic had to do with slavery. I mentioned that Uhura was with them throughout this ordeal. There is one moment when they three of them are witness to what happens when a slave gets out of line. For some reason, Uhura is forced to whip another slave because she lashed out when her “handler” tried to get handsy with her and she fought back. Of course, the person she must whip is a black man.

She refuses to do it, of course. But the scene, however fleeting and quickly done, spoke a lot about what having to even play in that scene must’ve been like. The white guy behind her is the one who, earlier, attempted to rape her while Kirk listened to her cry out. We assume that he was not able to get his way. But still. So much crammed into this story for her as a woman and a black woman. I was disappointed that it wasn’t delved into or discussed further.

DID THEY REALLY SAY THAT?

Dr. McCoy: Hope? I always thought that was a human failing, Mr. Spock.

Spock: True, doctor. Constant exposure does result in a certain degree of – contamination.

Original air date: December 29, 1967

SYNOPSIS

To protect a space station with a vital grain shipment, Kirk must deal with Federation bureaucrats, a Klingon battle cruiser and a peddler who sells furry, purring, hungry little creatures as pets.

CANON CONTEXT

Let’s learn about tribbles: The use of live animals to represent the tribbles was immediately ruled out. According to Gerrold’s account, as their similarity to Heinlein’s flat cats was not yet discovered, the inspiration for the form of the tribble instead came from a fluffy keyring owned by Holly Sherman. Sherman’s Planet in this episode was subsequently named after her. The design came from Wah Chang, but they were individually sewn by Jacqueline Cumeré. She was paid $350 to sew five hundred tribbles from synthetic fur and stuff them with foam rubber. Six ambulatory tribbles were made using the mechanisms of walking toy dogs, which were quite noisy and required the dialogue to be looped in during editing. Other tribbles were created by Jim Rugg out of beanbags for when it was required for one to sit on a person or object, and the breathing tribbles were hollow with surgical balloons inserted.

RECAP

This is the one. My favorite one. The one, I think, could be considered most referenced, especially in pop culture. And why not? It’s absolutely ridiculous from start to finish, the quick wit comments back and forth between cast and the storyline itself makes for great comedy (for the late 60’s). So, let’s delve in, shall we? Be warned this review has more images than the others for added context.

Where shall we begin? Perhaps, the Deep Space Station K7 that sent out a distress call which Enterprise felt compelled to answer.

Why was the DS K7 in distress? Well, because they currently are housing tons of quadrotriticale. A word that is managed to be repeated at least a dozen times (it seems) in one scene and it’s great watching each of them stumble over saying it right. It’s a grain by the way and Kirk is not pleased to have been summoned to the station over it. But undersecretary Nilz Baris insists that is be guarded against the Klingons who seem to want it desperately.

Kirk agrees to leave behind two guards which Baris is not happy about. He goes boo-hoo crying to the Federation who then call Kirk and tell him to return to the station and treat the quadrotriticale with a bit more urgency. Upon their return Kirk decides to let the crew use this time for shore leave.

A Klingon ship decides to do a similar respite here which also rubs Kirk the wrong way. But they are trying to be diplomatic, so all he can do is have one guard per Klingon that spends time at the space station. First up to take a break is Lieutenant Uhura. While hanging out at the local bar she encounters a shady tradesman trying to sell one tribble to the man behind the bar who seems less than interested. By the end of the negotiations, Uhura returns to the Enterprise with one free tribble.

Seems innocent enough. Cute and cuddly with a bit of a trill sound it makes. How much harm can it be? Look, even Mr. Spock seems to be mesmerized by the little guys.

Yep, in a matter of hours, the one tribble that Uhura brought on board managed to multiply and she’s giving them out like candy to all of the crew. Even Bones who is fascinated to learn how they are able to multiply so quickly.

As if that isn’t trouble enough, back on the space station the Klingons are getting drunk and rowdy at the bar. Well, one of them in particular.

He insults humans. He insults the captain. Oh hell no! Chekov is ready to go! But Scotty stops him. Kirk gave them instruction to behave and not get riled up by the Klingons in any way.

But then the Klingon insults the ship and Scotty couldn’t hold back. He throws the first punch and a bar fight begins. The barman gets the hell out of dodge and Cyrano Jones, the trader who you could say started all the problems, is helping himself to a few glasses of liquor while everyone is distracted.

With the fight broken up eventually, Kirk insists on knowing how it started. Who threw the first punch? Well, of course no one wants to snitch, least of all on Scotty who is a good guy. So, he has to snitch on himself and fess up. Kirk is pretty pleased to hear Scotty showed such gumption, that is, until he hears that Scotty didn’t actually throw a punch in defense of the captain, instead it was to honor the ship!

Chin up, Captain Kirk, you’ll get’em next time!

Okay, so while all of this is happening something even more sinister is taking place on the Enterprise. Also discovered when Kirk attempts to get a meal from the replicator.

This is crazy! I mean, look at all of those tribbles just hanging out. But to be in the replicator is really not good. Seconds later, Scotty arrives with an armful to say they are also in the ship making their controls inoperable.

This makes Kirk wonder if they are sneaking around within the ship, could they be in the storage areas on the space station. Turns out that grain he’s supposed to be protecting from the Klingons is being stored there. Quick! To the storage area!

I could be wrong but I think we’re too late. All the grain has been eaten by the tribbles. But what’s worse than finding out they’ve managed to multiply to over 1m? That most of the ones you see pictured there are dead. Why? Time for Bones to investigate the grain and the tribbles. Oh, and Bones delivers the great news that if they want the tribbles to stop multiplying they need to stop feeding them. Thanks, Bones.

And just because I feel it must be seen, I want to share this still of the bridge:

Yes, that is a tribble nestled just under her chin there!

Now, what is going on here? Are the Klingons behind all this? Obviously! But it isn’t who Baris keeps insisting it is; the trader. Instead, it’s his trusted assistant. Turns out tribbles don’t like Klingons and start to freak out when they are brought near one. Sorry, mister, you’ve been caught.

Now, what to do with all of these tribbles on the space station? Well, instead of sending Cyrano Jones who took the tribble from its home planet to jail they decide he can spend the next two decades removing them all.

As for the tribbles on the Enterprise? Well, after a few ping-ponging back and forth between the crew to try and explain where the tribbles were sent, well, I’ll let you read the answer below:

DID THEY REALLY SAY THAT?

[last lines]

[all tribbles have been removed from the Enterprise, but nobody seems eager to tell Kirk what happened to them]

Capt. Kirk: Mister Scott. Where – are – the tribbles?

Scott: I used the transporter, Captain.

Capt. Kirk: You used the transporter?

Scott: Aye.

Capt. Kirk: Well, where did you transport them?

[the others are looking away, trying to appear not involved]

Capt. Kirk: Scott, you didn’t transport them into space, did you?

Scott: Captain Kirk! That’d be inhuman!

Capt. Kirk: Well, where are they?

Scott: I gave them a very good home, sir.

Capt. Kirk: WHERE?

Scott: I gave ’em to the Klingons, sir.

Capt. Kirk: [whispering] You gave them to the Klingons?

Scott: Aye, sir. Before they went into warp, I transported the whole kit ‘n’ caboodle into their engine room, where they’ll be no tribble at all.

[Writer’s Note: I apologize for the many days off I took before resuming these reviews. Needed the time. Should be back to the daily grind tomorrow.]

Original air date: December 22, 1967

Captain’s Log, Stardate 3614.9

SYNOPSIS

Kirk and the Enterprise computer become detectives after Scotty is accused of murdering women on a pleasure planet.

CANON CONTEXT

Nothing of note to mention about this episode.

RECAP

This episode is all about Scotty and I love that. Apparently he suffered some sort of mental breakdown that has left him hating women. Solution? Take him to a planet where everyone is fun loving, especially the scantily clad, belly gyrating women.

Something tells me this trip is more for Kirk and Bones than it is for Scotty, brought them to lift his spirits and give him a better feeling about women in general.

And he surely has it when he has his eyes set on this belly dancer. Kirk, being the kind gentleman that he is, thinking only of his men. Invites this particular woman to their table where she proceeds to only show interest in Scotty. I mean, have you heard his Irish accent?

There is some strange gentleman at the next table who seems less than pleased with the way the three men are ogling her and storms off. Shortly after, Scotty and the belly dancer leave as well. Take a stroll in the “London-like” fog.

Nothing left for Bones and Kirk to do but head on over to another spot where the women are…well…I’ll leave that to your imagination. Off they go, but not before they hear a bloodcurdling scream and find themselves in the middle of a gruesome murder. Victim? The woman who left with Scotty, who happens to be standing nearby, bloody dagger in hand, in shock.

Is Scotty guilty of murdering this woman? He does hate women after all. And Kirk can’t ruffle any feathers as they are guests on this non-violent planet. In comes their lawyer and it took me less than a second to realize where I recognized him.

If you watch Golden Girls as often as I do, you’ll know who this is, but he’s from one of my favorite episodes, Love Me Tender (S4E14): Dorothy dates a short, bald man with whom she has nothing in common – except for great lovemaking.

Eddie: [Dorothy’s blind date finally arrives] Hi, I’m Eddie.

Dorothy: [to the girls] It took a computer to come up with this?

Eddie: [Eddie explains that he’s been in a long depression, and is still not completely recovered] After twenty-five years of marriage, my wife, Roberta sent me a Dear John letter.

Rose: That’s terrible. Married twenty-five years and she doeesn’t know your name is Eddie?

Anyway, moving on. You have to watch it to get all the jokes.

So this lawyer, a guy the planet uses from now and then, I guess, to help with these kind of disputes. He’ll be helping prove Scotty’s innocence. First step, get some other suspects.

Like these two guys. Except the guy on the far left is in love with her and was hoping to marry her. And the older gentleman is her father. I guess they won’t be able to help. Perhaps if the Enterprise can beam down someone on their ship who can put Scotty through a series of tests that will reveal what really happened to him when he blacked out, conveniently forgetting if he killed the girl or not.

But how can Kirk help Scotty if he keeps on being caught over dead bodies. Yep, you guessed it, another Star Trek NPC bites the proverbial dust.

What makes this scene so strange is they talk about this dead girl but never look at her. It was as if they were given direction to look at the camera instead of down at her body. You have to see the episode to understand what I mean.

Dead bodies keep piling up and no one but Scotty is in the area of the dead body. Plus, his lawyer doesn’t seem all too happy with how the Enterprise is handling the proceedings. However, the prefect of the planet agrees to let them conduct their investigation as they see fit if they allow his wife to do her own investigating. She is some sort of empath or something that can sense the truth by holding on to an object. In this case, the murder weapon used in both murders.

Don’t get too attached to her, though. Shortly after they all sit in a circle to prepare her seance or whatever, she apparently feels a dark and evil presence by the name of Redjac? This evil spirit seems like a really bad entity. The lights go out! I give you one guess what they find when the lights come back on…

So, with three dead bodies, one of them being the wife of the prefect, Kirk has only one ace left to play. Lucky for him the people on this planet really are pretty passive. I was surprised at how willing the prefect was willing to go, even so far as to move the entire court proceeding onto the Enterprise.

Once there, the time has come to prove Scotty isn’t responsible but instead…Jack, the ripper?!

I kid you not! That Redjac person the woman was talking about earlier, turns out is the “name change” of Red Jack which can also be known as Jack the Ripper. It’s really quite wild even to hear them talk about it and try to follow. I’d have to rewatch it to try and really understand how they added 2 + 2 to get 5, but let’s suppose their right. Who among them is this Redjac?

He’s not actually the lawyer. He’s just in the lawyer’s body. When they subdue him, Redjac manages to enter the computer system where it’s now taken over the ship and is trying to terrify everyone. Turns out, Redjac feeds off of fears. Who better to scare than an entire planet of non-violent people?

The only solution, which I still can’t believe, is to give everyone on the ship a dose of “happy drugs” so that no matter what Redjac does or says, no one will be scared. Everyone just thinks what’s happening is hilarious and groovy. Eventually, they are able to transport Redjac off the ship and save the day.

Wild episode. But nothing compared to the one I’ve been waiting a long time to see next!

DID THEY REALLY SAY THAT?

Voice of Redjac: I am without ending. I have existed from the dawn of time, and I shall I live beyond its end! In the meantime, I shall feed, and this time I do not need a knife. You will all die horribly in searing pain!

Mr. Spock: It is attempting to generate terror, Captain.

Voice of Redjac: I can cut off your oxygen and suffocate you!

Sulu: Captain.

[McCoy injects Sulu with a hydrospray, Sulu immediately becomes euphoric]

Sulu: Whoever he is, he sure talks gloomy.

[starts to rise from chair]

Captain James T. Kirk: [pushing Sulu back into his chair] Man your post, Sulu.

Mr. Spock: An entity which feeds on fear and terror would find a perfect hunting ground on Argelius, a planet without violence, where the inhabitants are as peaceful as sheep. The entity would be as a hungry wolf in that fold.

Original air date: December 15, 1967

Captain’s Log, Stardate 3619.2

SYNOPSIS

Capt. Kirk obsessively hunts for a mysterious cloud creature he encountered in his youth.

CANON CONTEXT

“Lieutenant Lesley” played by regular Star Trek background actor is killed in this episode, however his character re-appears (and is referred to by name) in many subsequent episodes. Paskey was one of the core group of regular Star Trek extras and appeared in almost every episode, including the second pilot “”, until he left the show in the middle of the third season.

RECAP

Captain Kirk is obsessed. Just take a look at his facial expression here to fully grasp just how obsessed he is.

No, he’s not obsessed with that actor. He’s obsessed with the smoky thing that ultimately killed him and a bunch of other crewman.

It’s a thing Kirk encountered 11 years prior when he was on the just a lieutenant on the USS Farragut. His captain was Garrovick, same name as the new security officer taking over for the poor sod who was killed earlier. They waste no time replacing people around here.

Armed with the belief that his hesitation in destroying this thing 11 years ago that led to the deaths of half the crew and the captain, Kirk is beyond obsessed. He wants that thing dead. However, Spock and Bones are concerned that Kirk is shirking his duties as captain of the ship. See, aside from this, the main mission is to get rendezvous with USS Yorktown and get some really important medicine that has a short life span and could save the lives of others waiting for it.

It’s not very often we see Bones and Spock team up. Even Bones finds he needs a drink when Spock comes to him for advice on how to deal with Kirk’s current obsession.

I should probably mention this smoky creature drains humans of their blood and leaves them looking rather silvery-gray in color. Terrible makeup job, but they had to do something to represent blood drainage.

After Ensign Garrovick has a similar encounter with the smoke-thing he is relieved of duty by Kirk and sent to his quarters (for a time). It is around this time that I want to mention Nurse Chapel. An unsung hero. Not unlike Uhura who at least is expected to have some brains as she is a lieutenant. Nurse Christine is just a nurse but every scene with her in it is gold. This is no different. Brings a bit of laughter in an otherwise intense episode. She is sent by Bones to deliver food to his patient, Ensign Garrovick who is less than pleased to see her. She proceeds to threaten him with feeding him intravenously in sickbay if he does not eat the food she brought him. Upon returning to sickbay with the “prescription” she claims to have been written by Dr. McCoy, he asks her why she took files on some random thing with her to deliver food. Psychology, doctor. Just psychology.

Okay, getting back to it. Kirk takes the ship to chase after this creature which is now on the move. Before we know it, it manages to get inside the ship and where do you suppose it ends up? In Ensign Garrovick’s quarters while he’s getting a pep talk from Spock.

The thing is, there’s supposed to be a correlation between this ensign and the Kirk of 11 years ago. Both men blaming themselves for the predicament they are in. I gotta say, of all the “past references” that we’ve seen in certain episodes so far, this is one I’m just not really that into. I spent more time wanting the solution to be reached than anticipating the next move. Especially since it seemed so out of character for Kirk to just snap at everyone for no reason. It’s not like anyone was stepping out of line or even getting in his way, even when Spock and Bones threaten to file a report of his unorthodox actions. Felt very off-script.

We finally reach the end when Kirk surmises the creature is headed back to where it encountered USS Farragut 11 years ago. Turns out it has a home planet there to reproduce. And of course, we can’t let that happen. I must say, when it comes to the federation rules, they don’t seem to be helpful to creatures they don’t understand. It’s more of a kill first and investigate or learn, never.

Kirk and Ensign Garrovick beam down to the planet to set a trap. A large amount of blood in a jar. They set up a bomb that they will detonate at the right moment as they beam back onto the ship and effectively kill it.

There is a moment where Garrovick worries the captain might decide to use himself as bait for the creature to make sure it is blown up. A fight ensues between the two men. But it’s short lived. They are beamed back on the ship but not before some technical difficulties happen. Reminding us just how much Bones hates the idea of having his molecules manipulated in space. That’s how he describes the transport system. As we are always reminded, he is a simple country doctor, not used to being on a space ship.

With the creature now dead, how they confirm that is unknown to me, they are finally able to meet up with USS Yorktown and complete their initial mission.

DID THEY REALLY SAY THAT?

Nurse Chapel: Hi. Everyone else is at alert station, so I brought you some dinner.

Ensign Garrovick: I’m not hungry.

Nurse Chapel: Doctor’s orders.

Ensign Garrovick: [confined to his quarters] What’s happening?

Nurse Chapel: Are we still chasing that thing halfway across the galaxy? Yes. Has the captain lost his sense of balance? Maybe. Is the entire crew about ready to explode? Positively. You’re lucky you’re out of it.

Ensign Garrovick: What do mean “out of it?” I caused it. You know that, too, don’t you? If I’d fired my phaser quickly enough on Argus 10, this wouldn’t have happened.

Nurse Chapel: Your self-pity’s a terrible first course. Why don’t you try the soup instead?

Ensign Garrovick: I told you, Christine, I’m not hungry.

Nurse Chapel: Dr. McCoy thought you might say something like that. This is his officially logged prescription for you. It has one word on it: eat. Now, if you don’t follow his orders, Dr. McCoy could and possibly would have you hauled down to Sickbay and fed intravenously.

Scott: Captain, thank heaven.

Mr. Spock: Mr. Scott, there was no deity involved. It was my cross-circuiting to B that recovered them.

Dr. McCoy: Well, then, thank pitchforks and pointed ears! As long as it worked, Jim.

Original air date: December 8, 1967

SYNOPSIS

A landing party from the Enterprise is exposed to strange form of radiation which rapidly ages them.

CANON CONTEXT

DeForest Kelley (Dr. McCoy) said of the make-up used in this episode, “I only worked half days on that show because I was in makeup the other half. I’d sit in the chair for a while, then I’d take a break, go to the john, come back and they’d work some more. It was a tremendous makeup effort. There were three makeup men working on me all the time, on my hands and on my face. Leonard [Nimoy] was lucky on that show. He was blessed by the fact that Vulcans don’t age as fast as humans.”

RECAP

This was a great one for acting I must say. The crew landing party encounter a couple of people on the planet who should be in their late twenties but what they discover is very odd. Even for Star Trek standards.

Jumping back a few minutes, Chekov encounters one of the people who should be alive and well on the planet. Except, he’s very much dead from old age. This spooks him and in that moment of absolute terror he becomes immune to what happens next to the rest of the landing party.

What happens next is left up to the acting gods because between Bones, Spock, Scotty, and Kirk I don’t know who aged better. Actually, I take that back. My money is on Scotty. Grey looks good on him.

And never to be forgotten, here comes this week’s femme fatale for Kirk. Except, this one is slightly different. This is clearly a love interest that spans many years which we have only seen once before in a previous episode. But with this one at least she looks age appropriate for him. Slightly wrinkled but no less “his type” that’s for sure. And it just so happens that her last relationship was with a man 26 older than her. So naturally, seeing Kirk in all his grey glory gets her all kinds of hot for him.

Meanwhile, everyone is aging rapidly and Chekov has become their guinea pig while Bones tries to find out why he isn’t aging but the rest of them are. I also should mention this episode also had the spare crewman that would die later on in the episode from old age. This only makes the need to find a cure that much more prevalent. Chekov is pissed but he must subject himself to the studies till they find the cure.

Is it time for a cat nap? I think so. If you’ll excuse me…

Hmm? What was that? Oh yeah, the rest of the episode. Besides needing to reverse this crazy aging thing, Kirk has to put up with a commodore on their ship removing him from command the more he seems to age. Spock is aging as well so he feels ill-equipped to take over from Kirk. The courtroom scene is worth giving a watch as Kirk fumbles his way through it, trying to prove that age is nothing but a number. He fails epically, but the point is made that he will stop at nothing to retain control over his ship. So much so that when the cure is possibly uncovered he’s willing to risk his rapidly debilitating life to test it on himself first.

And right on time to cause the Enterprise is in a losing battle with the Romulans. And Kirk employs an old trick to make them leave! This is quite possibly the first evidence I can think of where a previous episode is clearly mentioned when he announces over a channel he knows the Romulans can hear that the Enterprise is going to employ their Corbomite machine that they have. If you recall, Corbomite is completely made up but he uses it back on Season I Episode 10 The Corbomite Maneuver in order to escape an enemy then. And it helps him again.

We end with Bones informing Spock that he has an antidote for him to his aging process can reverse. It took longer to make because, as we are always reminded, Spock is part Vulcan, so his internals aren’t the same as everyone else’s. And for funsies, Bones made the antidote extra potent so Spock suffers even worse than they did when they took it. Yay!

DID THEY REALLY SAY THAT?

McCoy: Anytime you’re ready, Mr. Spock.

Spock: I am quite ready now, Doctor.

McCoy: Because of your Vulcan physique, I’ve prepared an extremely potent shot for you. However, I thought you’d might like to know that I’ve removed all the breakables from sickbay.

Spock: That is very considerate of you, Doctor.

Original air date: December 1, 1967

SYNOPSIS

The Federation clashes with the Klingon Empire over mining rights to Capella IV. A sudden coup between its warrior-minded inhabitants forces Kirk’s party to flee with the now dead leader’s pregnant wife.

CANON CONTEXT

The episode’s title is derived from a traditional English poem, known as “Monday’s Child”. The reference is to a line in the 1887 Harper’s Weekly version of the poem: “Friday’s child is full of woe.”

RECAP

The episode is named after the famous Monday’s Child poem, except I’m not sure if they meant to call it “Friday’s Child” as probably Wednesday’s Child would’ve been more appropriate.

As Friday’s Child is loving and giving that hardly seems in line with the way Star Trek episodes typically end up. Full of woe seems much more like it.

I won’t go into the outfits that this group of people on the planet Capella IV, except to say it’s…odd? Yes, I think odd is the wording for it. But then again, I can’t fault TOS too much. I’m sure their budgetary constraints meant they could only do so much to have encounters with other cultures on other planets seem as different from our own as possible. They can’t all be alien but just “really different” from what we think of as normal when it comes to their customs and behaviors.

This planet is no different. Reminds me of the way the “alternate universe” is treated where the flip side of the coin is that everyone is cutthroat and you have to watch your back. In this instance it’s very much the same.

There is a mining community that the Federation is very interested in. Unbeknownst to them, the Klingons, their fiercest enemy, is also interested in the same mine and they are looking to make a deal.

As much as I’d love to hang about and tell you what happened between Kirk wanting to kill the Klingon and all that, I much rather zoom in on the other story. The B story but just as fascinating.

The leader of this group known as the Tier (not pronounced the way it’s read…) is assassinated and his wife who is with child is besides herself. I guess, in their culture, for the husband to die means that they must die as well. And it also means they want nothing whatever to do with the child they are carrying. Interesting on so many levels.

This Tier’s wife, however, seems to fancy McCoy (aka Bones) and in his adamant desire to be a doctor and do what doctors do best, heal their patients, decides he’s going to make this woman want to live and also want to care for their child whether she likes it or not.

There is even an amazing moment when she slaps him when he tries to touch her stomach to find out how close she is to having the baby and he slaps her back! Man, that was quite the moment. After that she is clearly in love and when he tries to get her to want her child by repeating the mantra, “The child is mine. The child is mine. It is MINE.” She confuses this by thinking the child is HIS, as in McCoy’s and she continues to refer to the child in that way, even in front of Spock and Kirk who are altogether confused.

A baby is born, huzzah!

I think in the end the planet decides to do business with the Federation and not with the Klingons. I honestly don’t remember how all that turns out cause I was way more interested in Bones’ story. It’s rare for someone other than Kirk to get their moment with the on screen femme fatale, in this case played by none other than Julie Newmar, of Catwoman fame! Oh, did I forget to mention that? I thought you would recognize her and didn’t need me to say it. Sheesh!

Anywho, the baby is named after Kirk and Bones but not after Spock who was also on the planet and rescued them from the Klingon’s doing them harm so you’d think he’d have been included. As usual Bones and Kirk thought they would tease Spock about this fact but instead he gets one up on them. Doesn’t he always…

DID THEY REALLY SAY THAT?

McCoy: [speaking of Eleen] Representing the High Tier, Leonard James Akaar!

Spock: The child was named Leonard James Akaar?

McCoy: Has a kind of a ring to it, don’t you think, James?

Captain James T. Kirk: Yes, I think it’s a name destined to go down in galactic history, Leonard. What do you think, Spock?

Spock: I think you’re both gonna be insufferably pleased with yourselves for at least a month… sir.